An empty weekend...
Friday night plans with my friends fell through and I couldn't be happier.
I adore my friends. I'd do literally (almost) anything for them. Our time together is so precious to me and I love hosting.
Something you need to understand about me is that I've worked hard to grow my friendships. I did a hard-reset on my life in 2019, mere months before the pandemic hit. The relationship I'd been in was very unhealthy and I left with my dogs, my books, and the clothes on my back. It was a really rough time. I'd been isolated because of this person for so long that I only had a few people I could rely on.
That's when I made it my mission to cultivate as many friendships as I could sustain. I'm forever grateful that so many amazing folks took a chance on a stray like me.
They say that making friends in your thirties is hard and that's somewhat true. It's hard to know where to start and harder to coordinate schedules. Thankfully, I have friends who have other friends, many of whom are community-minded. Sometimes it really does take one connection for your life to blossom in unexpected ways.
I got space to breathe because I knew I had people supporting me, which then allowed me to finally come out. I'd identified as bi for most of my life, but hadn't found much fulfillment in my relationships with men. When I was able to take a step back and reflect, I was able to step into an identity that felt more true to myself.
I can truly say that I'm proud of the life I've built and even more proud to be in community with so many amazing folks.
However. I do still want a lazy weekend every now and then. Quiet time to myself fills my cup in a different, but equally important, way.
Whew, that was super reflective. Some earnestness does a body good every now and then. Now I'm probably gonna take a gummy and order some pizza. The night is mine!!
And omg I'm gonna sleep in so fuckin' late tomorrow, y'all have no idea.